About

Welcome! We’re a community of women in London dedicated to fostering sisterhood and creating local connections for women and girls who experienced the early loss of mothering (when they were under 21).

We’ve been meeting all over London since 2014, sharing our experiences, friendship, resources and plenty of laughs. There’s a magic that happens when motherless daughters get together; an instant recognition, sense of loyalty, and a natural mentoring that develops between us when we meet.

In 2024 we won a small grant to develop a community project bringing together younger motherless daughters, their siblings and their families for friendship and peer support. Our intention is to honour and mobilise our experience to improve life outcomes and strengthen community around the early loss of mothering.  

What & Why

Losing a mum or mothering early is one of the hardest experiences a young person can know and it’s one which is societally feared and stigmatised which shapes-concept early.
It’s more than a grief issue, and it doesn’t just happen through the death of a mother but in a myriad of ways. Experienced young it’s often a trauma, it can lead to emotional neglect (which is usually unintended). It can also be experienced as an abandonment, and not necessarily by the mother but a societal abandonment too. 

All this can bear lasting impacts on young people which aren’t usually seen at the time of separation. We know that without early recognition the loss of mothering can hamper development; build unhelpful coping defenses, affect self-worth, educational attainment and negate life outcomes.

 

We know these impacts are preventable. They’re not solely the result of the loss or the adversity but also how it’s responded to.

It needs to be recognised and healed on community levels and supported by our schools and systems, not just by the remaining care giver and not just behind closed doors.

Girls and their siblings and families need to be emotionally supported via the sharing and normalising of the experience with each another as well as with those of us who have already walked that path and understand it.

This project is therefore dedicated to building grassroots community networks around the early loss of mothering and to linking in with professional and statutory services as needed.

How

Meetups for Adult Motherless Daughters (who lost mothering whe they were under 21). 

We offer regular meet-ups where we can connect, share our experiences, friendship and resources. 

 

North London Community

On the ground we’ll also be hosting a series of community building events in north London and the boroughs of Camden, Barnet and Brent.

  • We’re setting up a service for younger motherless girls to meet one another locally, have fun, receive peer support and express themselves through creative activities in safe spaces.
  • We’ll also connect their fathers or guardians carers and their siblings together locally for peer support and we’ll be building a north London lived-experience volunteer and professional network around them.
  • Register your interest and help us build the network. Get Involved

Our aims

 

  • Raise awareness of all the issues around growing up without mothering.
  • Challenge outmoded cultural norms such as the death taboo and individualistic mind-sets which isolate young people following early adversity.
  • Foster local community and create real in-person connections to sustain motherless children, young people and their families longterm.

My Experience

 A little bit about me (Photini). Mum died just after her 42nd birthday and my 13th. Ten years later my father also died unexpectedly. I’ve been blessed with some wonderful people and experiences and adventures through life, but there have been enormous challenges. I know now that if I’d met others who understood while I was growing up and if I’d had a little more guidance life would have been much easier. READ MORE 

Values

There’s strength in numbers. Repair is all about connection to our peers who ‘get it’, connection to our emotions and to the part of ourselves we cut off and connection to the greater whole to which we all belong. 

Make friends with others who understand, have your back and have fun while you’re at it!

Emotional expression and the sharing your feelings in a safe, space supercharges your life, dismantles defences and restores trust!

Connection doesn’t come with conditions and it doesn’t cost anything to make local friends who understand you.